The Candy Crush Conundrum

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My friend Larry stared at the blinking cursor on his screen. He didn’t have a firm deadline for submitting the proposal, yet he knew it would be ideal to have it ready to go sooner rather than later. The weight of writing it felt like a year’s worth of work. The ask amount was $500,000… and every word felt monumental. What if he didn’t say enough? Or worse, what if he said too much and buried the point? Every time he opened the Google doc, his brain froze.

So, Larry did precisely what I would have done: he procrastinated. He reorganized his bookshelf. He grabbed coffee. He advanced a few more levels on Candy Crush and completed his daily solitaire challenges (or maybe that was just me…). He even cleaned his desk (twice). The proposal remained untouched, looming larger with each passing day.

It wasn’t until his mentor gave him a nudge that something shifted. “Larry,” she said, “don’t think about writing the whole thing. Just focus on the first paragraph. Get that down, and see how you feel.”

So, finally, Larry sat down and simply wrote an opening. To his surprise, it flowed. And once he started, he couldn’t stop. By the end of day, a solid draft was written - and a weight lifted from his shoulders.

Preparing a major gift fundraising proposal can feel overwhelming and intimidating.  You’re dealing with a perfect storm…large amounts of money, and wealthy, influential people.  There’s that nagging fear of receiving a rejection, the insecurity of feeling you might embarrass yourself, and misgivings about your competence. It’s understandable when paralysis sets in!

Patrick Lencioni, in his great book Getting Naked, encourages us to mitigate those issues by embracing humility, focusing on the relationship, and leading with curiosity. Fundraising then becomes less about fear and more about authentic connection. Vulnerability becomes your superpower. It’s a great foundation on which to dive into the work you need to do.

I’ve reflected a bit more on this, especially when it comes to writing large proposals. These five practical steps are game-changers that will help break free of paralysis:

1. Break it into bite-sized pieces

You don’t have to write that big proposal all at once. Divide it into sections - introduction, mission alignment, budget, etc. Tackle one section at a time, and be sure to celebrate small wins along the way.

2. Decide on your anchor story

Every great proposal starts with a story that connects emotionally. Before diving into facts and figures, identify a compelling narrative that embodies your mission’s impact, giving credence and hope to the project you’re inviting them to consider.

3. Draft ugly and collaborate

You can’t edit a blank page. The first draft need not be perfect - it just has to exist. Set a timer for 30 minutes and free-write your thoughts. Forget about formatting or eloquence. Once you’ve got a rough draft, recruit a colleague who can offer edits and insights.

4. Meditate

When the stakes are high, it’s easy to get lost in perfectionism. Step back and remind yourself why you’re raising these resources. Take ten minutes to meditate on your organization’s purpose. Keep your journal close by to jot down thoughts as they come to your heart and mind.

It’s very unlikely that you’ll knock out the entire proposal in one sitting. That’s okay. The secret to tackling a big, overwhelming task like this is to start small and start now. Whether it’s drafting a paragraph, making a phone call, jotting down ideas, or just sitting silently for a bit, take that crucial first step.  You’ll likely discover the mountain you thought you had to climb is really more of a hillock*.

Praying that you all have a great week!

* A small hill or mound

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If you haven't taken advantage of some of the resources I've created to help major gift fundraisers, take a look now!  Initial calls with me are free and "no strings attached".  Sometimes folks feel like they need to wait and not 'bother' me until they have a pressing issue.  No need for that...just make the call. 🕺

‍Here's where you can access a lot of content for free:

‍* Follow me on LinkedIn - You'll get short pro-tips and reflections on major gift fundraising every day between 5-7am pacific.

* Breakthru Newsletter - As you've seen here, these are longer weekly posts (audio and written) sent directly to your email.

* Breakthru Blog - the newsletter from the previous week gets posted here each week for everyone (so email subscribers get it a week early).

* Breakthru Podcast - Interviews with high net worth givers about how we as fundraisers can get better at inviting them to the party.  And audio readings of Breakthru Blog posts.

‍Before getting to the PAID stuff: My opinion is that no small ministry with a tight budget should be spending more than $3-5k (total) for major gift coaching/consulting.  Most of you will be good-to-go spending far less than that.  This was a major issue for me when I was a frontline fundraiser - major gift consultants were an expensive 'black-box-of-confusion' for me.  That stops now.

‍Here's the PAID stuff:

‍* Online Catalyst Course - This is a full brain dump of my 28+ years of experience - good, bad, ugly.  It's built around the fundamentals, the sacredness, and the fun, of major gift fundraising.  It's infused with Henri Nouwen reflections.  Many people can take this course and they will be 'cooking-with-gas' and not need any additional coaching from me on the core systems.  I'm grateful that this course has gotten *great* reviews.

* Live coaching with me - I refer to this as "brain rental".  The ROI on live coaching, as you might imagine, is extraordinary.

Finally, be sure to connect with my colleague Ivana Salloum.  She's super awesome and can help with scheduling and access to resources, etc.

I look forward to hearing about your good work!

Blessings,